22 Dec

Chivalry is dead

Who taught : Alex and Sangeetha

Chivalry is dead? (source: http://www.motifake.com/)

It is inevitable to experience so many different things by moving to another country. What is the most difficult thing to live in America as a Korean? I would say, it is English, English and English.

1. First of all, English itself is hard to master. Pronunciation, Vocabulary, Slangs, Listening… You name it. There are so many things to continuously practice and it is never ending.

2. And, because of English, it is hard to make American friends. Let’s face it! It is really hard to have a conversation for a long time in just English if you cannot listen and speak fast enough. Honestly, I used to have a headache after a long party with my American friends or a long conference call with customers. This then can definitely affect your work or study.

3. Due to the reason number 2, it is hard to learn new cultures. This creates a vicious circle. If you do not have many American friends, then you usually stay with people who came from the same country you are from. In my case, it is Korea. Then, you lose your chance to learn new cultures and, thus, you feel awkward to be surrounded by American people. As a result, your English cannot get better at all and you do not have any American friends and you do not learn American cultures.

Now, what is the solution? Well, there is only one thing I can say here. WHEN IN ROME! You should really be proactive to make as many American friends as possible and learn new cultures from them. You should also be honest. If you do not understand what they are saying, feel free to ask them. They will help you out.

Speaking of culture… When Jessy and I first moved here, she and I often took a walk after dinner. Talking about trees, animals and houses, we had fun. (FYI, there are squirrels, deer, and rabbits all over here.) But, something bad also happened. 🙂 She saw a guy opening a car door for a lady. I tried to ignore it. (As far as I know, guys in Korea usually do not do that for a lady.) But, she was like this is the time I need to say something. “Hey.. look at that. Don’t you think you need to do that for me? You never done that,” said she. Oh great….

Last Saturday, Jessy and I had lunch with Alex and Sangeetha. After lunch, the server came with checks. Sangeetha said, “You can give them to the guys.” Following it, Alex said, “I guess chivalry is not dead.” I did not get it.

So, chivalry itself refers to the medieval institution of knighthood. And it is often associated with ideals of knightly virtues, honor and of courtly love. For your better understanding, here are the examples of chivalry.

1. Open a car door for a lady or open a door of any place like a mall for a lady.

2. Pay for a lady’s meal

Now, if it is dead, it of course means no one would do it any more. Researching about this expression, I found a lot of arguments about whether chivalry is really dead or not on the Internet. There are some people who say women killed it because of feminism movement. What do you think? Is chivalry really dead? I guess it is a very subjective matter to answer, though. Let me put it this way then? Is chivalry dead in your marriage? Hope not!